Can I be honest with you? I hope so. I mean, you’re pretty much all I’ve got here.
I’ve really struggled with writing lately. Like, really struggled. I’ve written 2 blogs posts in a row that were last minute jobs. They probably have read like last minute jobs as well. In fact, this post today is a last minute job.
I hate that. I hate writing something at the last minute. It’s not my best work and the pressure to get something out the door makes this whole process feel way worse than it should.
Literally the only reason I’ve posted anything lately is because I made a promise to you at the beginning of the year that I would post 1 post a week all year long. I think that kind of consistency is important. Showing up every day is one of the keys to success. But it’s hard.
I’ve struggled with what to write about. Even though I have a hundred different ideas, I don’t really want to write about any of them. I’ve stuggled with making time to write. I’ve struggled with the words when I’ve finally sat down to write. So I think to myself “Maybe motivation is the problem? Maybe I’m just losing my motivation for writing.”
Or maybe it’s my job. I’ve been really busy at my work lately (we’re trying to ship a new app) and I’ve chosen to use the time that I should be writing as time for work. If I get up at 6:00am and I have an hour to do my quiet time and write for the day, I’ve been choosing to get up, maybe do my quiet time, and then get an extra half hour of work in before I actually go to work. That’s great - from a work perspective - but it sucks from a writing perspective.
Let’s just be honest, being busy at work is just an excuse for not writing. A “lack of motivation” is an excuse for not spending time where I know I need to spend it. Being busy someplace else doesn’t mean that I can slack on my other responsibilities, right? A lack of motivation doesn’t mean that I don’t have to show up every day. Just because I’m not feeling motivated or I’m busy doing other things on any particular day (or week) doesn’t mean that I can stop showing up at my job and doing what they are paying me to do. They would quite literally stop paying me and I wouldn’t have a job at all.
So I have to be able to work even though I don’t feel motivated. I have to be willing to show up even if I have other things to do.
But I’m not showing up. Not really. I’m posting, but it’s way less than half-hearted. I’ve gotten away from the habit of writing. I haven’t made the time to sit down and write on a regular basis in a long while. I don’t have the words to write effectively. So what’s going on? Here’s what I think is really happening:
Writing is where I have my best thoughts. Writing is one of those places where God and I tend to communicate best. So when I skip my writing time I lose out, not only on time to think but on time with God. Which is what I need more than anything else to be successful … in my job, with my family, in my life in general. The extra 30 minutes of work is great. Investing 30 minutes in God, writing, and my thoughts means that I can and will get way more than 30 extra minutes worth of productivity out of my day.
It’s the tithing principle, right? I can do a lot with 100% of my money. But when I am faithful and tithe 10% and allow God to handle my money, then He can do so much more with the 90% that’s left over than I ever could with the whole 100%. God desires the first and best of my finances because it helps us to trust Him. We and our money are blessed because of it.
In the same way, he desires the first and best of our days. So if I give him the first hour of my day (allow time for reading the Bible and praying and writing whatever it is that He wants me to write about that day) that means that I get to learn to trust that He is going to make me more productive throughout my day, and that He will bless me and everything I touch because of it.
So I guess if I were to boil all this down, my lack of writing shows my lack of spending time with God. I do a “quiet time” most days, but it’s probably 5 minutes reading through one of the plans on YouVersion. I don’t actually sit down, pull out my Bible, and read anything. I don’t usually take time to pray. I just move right into the next thing. Then I set about getting a head start on the work that is keeping my brain busy. I mean, we have an app to launch, right God?
What I’m learning in this season is that what I really need is this time with God. Three things specifically stand out.
- I really need to pull out my Bible and read it. I need to listen for God to speak through the words.
- I really need to take a few minutes - it doesn’t have to be long - and pray for a thing or things. I need to listen for God to tell me what to pray for and for Him to speak to me during that time.
- I really need to write again. It doesn’t have to be journaling my thoughts for posterity (although that’s good too). It can be writing for my blog if that’s what I feel like God wants me to write. In the midst of that writing, I need to be attentive and listening to what God, through His Holy Spirit, wants to say to me and through me to other people.
So maybe in the end it’s not really a lack of motivation to write. I mean, this little bit of rambling is over 1100 words. Maybe it’s not that I’m too busy. Maybe, just maybe, it’s more about my lack of time, presence, and relationship with God. While it feels like the problem is motivation, perhaps it’s a lack of divine inspiration because I’m so disconnected from the source.
It’s time for me to plug back in.
What about you? Are you struggling with the motivation to do what you know you should be doing? Maybe, like me, you’re finding yourself disconnected from your source. I’m challenging myself - and now I’m challenging you - to reconnect and give God the time He deserves as the first and foremost part of your day. Together, let’s see what happens. I bet we find motivation we didn’t know we had, and a productivity that will rival the best of the “hustlers” out there.
I’m in this with you. Let’s go!